Stubborn is as stubborn does...

Let's see a show of hands here...how many of you consider yourselves stubborn? I'm not talking procrastination, I'm talking mule-headed, stand-your-ground, I'm not going to do it no matter what until I decide its a good idea stubborn? I have to say that there are a few of us that will admit it and a number of us who will not admit to it.

I am pretty much there. I always thought that my dad, grandmother, and father-in-law were stubborn people. I understand that the Polish are a stubborn breed in and of themselves and New Englanders are pretty stubborn, too, so I was destined to be such whether by design or by association. I did not, however, realize the extent of my stubbornness until last night.

I have had a tremendous earache for the last three days. That actually was when the swelling and pain set in, I guess you could say that it has actually been the better part of a week because I could feel it backing up before that. Anyway, last night was the icing on the cake, so to speak.

Fridays are usually my baking day for the auction. I enjoy doing this and its a challenge to come up with something new every week. This week was especially challenging because between a flare up that was a tiny one and this ear of mine, concentration was not my best attribute. I finally got past the fog and such and decided on my desserts for Saturday.  About halfway through my day yesterday, well, maybe not even half way, my ear felt like it was on fire...literally. To top that off, it felt like it was draining to boot. So, off I go to make the rice bag that I have been putting off for a month to make for small injuries. For those of you who are not sure what on earth I'm talking about, if you place rice that you have sewn into a muslin bag into the microwave for a few seconds, you have a perfect heat pack, or if frozen, a great cold pack that will mold itself to the injury. So, off I go to make the rice bag, toss it in the microwave and plaster it to my ear because by now the whole right side of my face is swollen from the infection.

While I'm sitting at the computer, pretty much enjoying my pity party by myself, here comes Chris to inform me that if my eardrum bursts that it will hurt worse than it does. Way to make me feel better, Babe! Lol! Kidding...anyway, throughout the day he has been none too subtle about hitting the doctor's office. I called around noon to see if I could get in and was told that there was nothing until Tuesday, even urgent care.  Peachy. Back to the pity party.

Eating and watching our shows for the night was a true adventure. Now, understand I am totally unaware that my ear is so swollen that it is closed up, no opening exists at this time. As I'm eating and watching the boob tube, I am asking Chris to keep turning up the volume because I can't hear over the crunching. Still at this point not going to see a doctor, it doesn't hurt bad enough.

As I'm trying to wind down my day, I find that even vicodin is not touching the pain...time to admit defeat and hit the urgent care. I get there, a half an hour before they close for the night and the doctor can't even get the scope into my ear without damaging tissue. She asks how long I've had the symptoms, I tell her and she just shakes her head at me. She admonishes me about not coming in sooner and then informs me that the ear is so swollen that even the baby attachment won't go in because the whole ear is swollen shut. No hole. No way to tell what the damage is to my ear at this point. After scolding me for being stubborn and not seeing my doctor sooner, she sends me on my way with a list a mile long for prescriptions to treat this infection.

Moral of the story? Don't be stubborn. Did I learn my lesson? Probably not, but if it is involving my ears, I'll probably be more on the ball than I was this time. I was a little crabby last night with the pain going nuts on me, but today, I'm just a little....well, I was going to say amused about my ear swelling shut, but perhaps I'll rethink that one. Perhaps stupid is a better word. Taking unnecessary chances with my hearing was a bad idea. To not hear Chatty Cathy as she recounts everything that she has done for the day (even if I have been there while she has done it), or to not hear my favorite worship songs, Chris or Beth or Andrea saying that they love me...hearing my Little Monkey girl squeal when she sees Grandma on Skype...or the birds sing...yeah, being stubborn is not worth it.