2018 was a bugger...
I'm here to tell you, that 2018 brought some pretty tough stuff. To me, if I hadn't had the assurance that Jesus was right by my side, I think I would have had some pretty horrendous emotional issues.
Pretty much, I think of myself as a fairly strong person, emotionally and physically. In my hey-day, I could pack a 757 airplane pit so tight you couldn't see any space, and the carton of eggs in the middle would still have every egg whole. That example, and yes, it was something that I once did, just serves to say that physically I was pretty strong. My deduction skills, as far as doing something like that, were really good. No, I'm not tooting my own horn, I really am going somewhere with this.
I used to be able to walk for hours, hike, ride a bike, roller skate. I used to be able to sit down and read more than one paragraph in a book. Now? Not so much.
I don't know if it's age or the fibro, I suspect its a bit of both, along with my weight, which I'm managing to reduce slowly but surely, but still.
This past year, 2018, has taken a toll on not only me, but my family, my extended family, and friends. Those who had been considered strong physically have been taken down by heart issues, cancer, and strokes, not to mention a few severe muscle pulls, strains, and various other sundry issues. Those who would normally have strong emotional health have been brought down by illness, abuse (past and present), depression, and life issues. Those who have been strong financially, have been reduced to one income, or no income, thus bringing them to the point of homelessness, struggle or bankruptcy. 2018 has not been a kind year, for anyone.
I look at my life, personally and I see many struggles. Struggles with my book sales...being an independent author means you also publish indie. Publishing on the most popular site brings my books to the 6 millionth place, that is, when you're looking at the top 100 in book sales, I don't even rise above protozoa. I'm waayyy down there on the book sales food chain. Not because it's a lousy book, but because when there are on average 70k books published weekly, and mine is not a known name, you get lost in the translation, so to speak.
I fell earlier this year, resulting in a torn hamstring. Took weeks of PT to fix, and even still, if I move just right, I feel it tighten up and it hurts for a while. That, along with a couple of doctors, made me look at my weight in a different light. So, along with millions of others, I took on the challenge to lose weight, and with the exception of a bit of a rebellious period, I'm still on track, albeit slowly, to meet my first goal by February.
There have been emotional struggles. I've lost loved ones this year to cancer, friends who are dear to me have had their lives turned upside down because of accidents, loved ones are facing ongoing health issues that could be problematic or worse. I have always been there for those friends and family who are struggling with depression, and I will continue to do so. Even though it is draining, I know that God strengthens me so that my shoulders are broad enough, and my ears listen to the one who needs to talk, vent, or just cry. God has made sure that my heart, even though it breaks every time, is strong enough to take what is given, and He has given me words and wisdom so far, to keep them going.
Financially, well, we all struggle from time to time to make ends meet. Sometimes we have more month than money, but God has always seen us through. Always.
This post isn't really about my struggles, per se, but to point out that we all struggle. There's always rough spots, and times when we aren't sure where the next meal is coming from, where the money to get the car fixed can be found. There will always be heartache, worry, sickness and death. The Bible says that our paths will see these things, and we are not to worry about them. There are over 100 passages in both the Old and New Testaments that speak of troubles...troubles we see in the world with wars and rumors of wars; troubles in the natural world with earthquakes, storms, and the like, and troubles in our daily lives, spiritually and physically. With each trouble the Bible encourages to take heart, to be strong and steadfast in our faith, to lean on the One who can right the wrongs.
But, what about the here and now, you ask? What about today? I know from personal experience that the hear and now can be troublesome. I know that even the strongest of us can be brought down with the smallest of things. I know how hard it is to just look up and cry out to God for relief. I know how hard it is to look at a loved one who is struggling, whether it is to continue living or for other reasons, knowing that you have no way to help other than to offer your presence and your prayers, and wonder if God is still listening, if He understands your blubbering or your erratic prayers that make absolutely no sense to you, and how can He possibly answer such gibberish? I'm here to tell you that He is still there, He does still care, and He is, most definitely listening. I know that today, I'm still here, I'm still going, taking life one day, minute, second at a time...one step at a time, and you can, too.
There's a poem called Footsteps, I'm sure most of you are familiar with it. At the end of the poem, it points out that the time where there is only one set of footsteps visible, is the time that He carried you. You know what? I believe that with my whole heart.
Those times when you feel as if you're alone, struggling in your life, take heart...you are not alone! Let me share something with those of you who feel that everything is going against you...
First, the obvious...you woke up. There are some who are mourning the loss of loved ones who did not. Do you have a job? This is good. There are still many without a job. It may not be your dream job, but it puts money in the account for you to live on. Do you have a car? This is good. There are some who do not have transportation. Are you able to walk? This is good, there are those who have been told they will never walk again. Can you see? There are those who have lost their sight due to accidents, glaucoma, or were born without sight. Do you have a family? This is good, there are those who have lost their families due to natural disasters, wars, imprisonment. Do you see? There is so much to be thankful for, even when we can't see past the nose on our own faces.
Yes, for me and my family, 2018 was a major bugger. It was filled with so much that I wished never happened. So many things I wished I could have changed or could change. A lot that was due to my own faux pas as well as things that were out of my control. But there were other things. Good things.
My youngest daughter became engaged to a young man who makes her laugh, shares in her geekiness, loves her daughters as if they were his own, and loves her more than himself. I have lost some weight which has helped with some health issues, reducing the impact of them. I have made new friends, and strengthened the friendships I have.
My husband is gearing up to retirement...whether it's in five years or longer, we don't know, but he is looking forward to it.
My oldest has enjoyed, for the most part, good health, and we have avoided any hospital stays.
My parents, although they could be in better health, are doing well, finding new options as they continue in their sunset years.
Friends that have struggled spiritually are leaning in and finding that God is providing.
God has made a way for us to keep on keeping on, and has been faithful, even when I haven't been, and even when it's been tough. This is what the Apostle Paul says in Romans 5:3-5:
More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
And in James 1:12:
Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.
My friends, if 2018 has been hard for you, take heart. We are coming to a new year, and new hope. Know that there is a God in Heaven that loves you so much that He sent His Son to die so that you might have Everlasting Life. This life has it's struggles, it's turmoil, it's defeats, it's mourning, but in Eternity, that will not be. The Bible says in Romans 12:12 to rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, and be constant in prayer.
When we turn to Scripture, we will find a calm that we've never had before. In Revelation 21:4, we are given this promise to all who have accepted Christ in their lives:
He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.
2018 has indeed been harsh, but it is past us now. Look forward to a new year, a new hope, new mercies. Accept the Gift that was born in a manger, and lived His life to die for yours. Accept the sacrifice He made on the cross, to take your sins on His shoulders, so that He might defeat death and hell, so that you might have eternal life. Then, no matter what 2019 throws at you, you will not be alone, for the God who loves you more than anything will be with you through everything.
Be blessed, my friends, and have a wonderful, safe New Year.
Pretty much, I think of myself as a fairly strong person, emotionally and physically. In my hey-day, I could pack a 757 airplane pit so tight you couldn't see any space, and the carton of eggs in the middle would still have every egg whole. That example, and yes, it was something that I once did, just serves to say that physically I was pretty strong. My deduction skills, as far as doing something like that, were really good. No, I'm not tooting my own horn, I really am going somewhere with this.
I used to be able to walk for hours, hike, ride a bike, roller skate. I used to be able to sit down and read more than one paragraph in a book. Now? Not so much.
I don't know if it's age or the fibro, I suspect its a bit of both, along with my weight, which I'm managing to reduce slowly but surely, but still.
This past year, 2018, has taken a toll on not only me, but my family, my extended family, and friends. Those who had been considered strong physically have been taken down by heart issues, cancer, and strokes, not to mention a few severe muscle pulls, strains, and various other sundry issues. Those who would normally have strong emotional health have been brought down by illness, abuse (past and present), depression, and life issues. Those who have been strong financially, have been reduced to one income, or no income, thus bringing them to the point of homelessness, struggle or bankruptcy. 2018 has not been a kind year, for anyone.
I look at my life, personally and I see many struggles. Struggles with my book sales...being an independent author means you also publish indie. Publishing on the most popular site brings my books to the 6 millionth place, that is, when you're looking at the top 100 in book sales, I don't even rise above protozoa. I'm waayyy down there on the book sales food chain. Not because it's a lousy book, but because when there are on average 70k books published weekly, and mine is not a known name, you get lost in the translation, so to speak.
I fell earlier this year, resulting in a torn hamstring. Took weeks of PT to fix, and even still, if I move just right, I feel it tighten up and it hurts for a while. That, along with a couple of doctors, made me look at my weight in a different light. So, along with millions of others, I took on the challenge to lose weight, and with the exception of a bit of a rebellious period, I'm still on track, albeit slowly, to meet my first goal by February.
There have been emotional struggles. I've lost loved ones this year to cancer, friends who are dear to me have had their lives turned upside down because of accidents, loved ones are facing ongoing health issues that could be problematic or worse. I have always been there for those friends and family who are struggling with depression, and I will continue to do so. Even though it is draining, I know that God strengthens me so that my shoulders are broad enough, and my ears listen to the one who needs to talk, vent, or just cry. God has made sure that my heart, even though it breaks every time, is strong enough to take what is given, and He has given me words and wisdom so far, to keep them going.
Financially, well, we all struggle from time to time to make ends meet. Sometimes we have more month than money, but God has always seen us through. Always.
This post isn't really about my struggles, per se, but to point out that we all struggle. There's always rough spots, and times when we aren't sure where the next meal is coming from, where the money to get the car fixed can be found. There will always be heartache, worry, sickness and death. The Bible says that our paths will see these things, and we are not to worry about them. There are over 100 passages in both the Old and New Testaments that speak of troubles...troubles we see in the world with wars and rumors of wars; troubles in the natural world with earthquakes, storms, and the like, and troubles in our daily lives, spiritually and physically. With each trouble the Bible encourages to take heart, to be strong and steadfast in our faith, to lean on the One who can right the wrongs.
But, what about the here and now, you ask? What about today? I know from personal experience that the hear and now can be troublesome. I know that even the strongest of us can be brought down with the smallest of things. I know how hard it is to just look up and cry out to God for relief. I know how hard it is to look at a loved one who is struggling, whether it is to continue living or for other reasons, knowing that you have no way to help other than to offer your presence and your prayers, and wonder if God is still listening, if He understands your blubbering or your erratic prayers that make absolutely no sense to you, and how can He possibly answer such gibberish? I'm here to tell you that He is still there, He does still care, and He is, most definitely listening. I know that today, I'm still here, I'm still going, taking life one day, minute, second at a time...one step at a time, and you can, too.
There's a poem called Footsteps, I'm sure most of you are familiar with it. At the end of the poem, it points out that the time where there is only one set of footsteps visible, is the time that He carried you. You know what? I believe that with my whole heart.
Those times when you feel as if you're alone, struggling in your life, take heart...you are not alone! Let me share something with those of you who feel that everything is going against you...
First, the obvious...you woke up. There are some who are mourning the loss of loved ones who did not. Do you have a job? This is good. There are still many without a job. It may not be your dream job, but it puts money in the account for you to live on. Do you have a car? This is good. There are some who do not have transportation. Are you able to walk? This is good, there are those who have been told they will never walk again. Can you see? There are those who have lost their sight due to accidents, glaucoma, or were born without sight. Do you have a family? This is good, there are those who have lost their families due to natural disasters, wars, imprisonment. Do you see? There is so much to be thankful for, even when we can't see past the nose on our own faces.
Yes, for me and my family, 2018 was a major bugger. It was filled with so much that I wished never happened. So many things I wished I could have changed or could change. A lot that was due to my own faux pas as well as things that were out of my control. But there were other things. Good things.
My youngest daughter became engaged to a young man who makes her laugh, shares in her geekiness, loves her daughters as if they were his own, and loves her more than himself. I have lost some weight which has helped with some health issues, reducing the impact of them. I have made new friends, and strengthened the friendships I have.
My husband is gearing up to retirement...whether it's in five years or longer, we don't know, but he is looking forward to it.
My oldest has enjoyed, for the most part, good health, and we have avoided any hospital stays.
My parents, although they could be in better health, are doing well, finding new options as they continue in their sunset years.
Friends that have struggled spiritually are leaning in and finding that God is providing.
God has made a way for us to keep on keeping on, and has been faithful, even when I haven't been, and even when it's been tough. This is what the Apostle Paul says in Romans 5:3-5:
More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
And in James 1:12:
Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.
My friends, if 2018 has been hard for you, take heart. We are coming to a new year, and new hope. Know that there is a God in Heaven that loves you so much that He sent His Son to die so that you might have Everlasting Life. This life has it's struggles, it's turmoil, it's defeats, it's mourning, but in Eternity, that will not be. The Bible says in Romans 12:12 to rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, and be constant in prayer.
When we turn to Scripture, we will find a calm that we've never had before. In Revelation 21:4, we are given this promise to all who have accepted Christ in their lives:
He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.
2018 has indeed been harsh, but it is past us now. Look forward to a new year, a new hope, new mercies. Accept the Gift that was born in a manger, and lived His life to die for yours. Accept the sacrifice He made on the cross, to take your sins on His shoulders, so that He might defeat death and hell, so that you might have eternal life. Then, no matter what 2019 throws at you, you will not be alone, for the God who loves you more than anything will be with you through everything.
Be blessed, my friends, and have a wonderful, safe New Year.
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